Saturday Kids Party & Sunday Breakfast Buffet

We held a kids party at our home for Portia's little friends. Portia had loads of fun. I wasn't sure how she was going to react with all the children playing with her toys but she was a trooper. Alyssia, our niece, came to help out and handled all the arts and crafts. I definitely couldn't have done it without her. Alex made this great tomato sauce (he's become such a great cook) which seemed to be a hit with everyone. You're never sure what to put on the menu when you've got little ones to please. We made a butterfly cake with flowers and spiders all around. Of course the spiders were big hits with the boys. With all that sugar, all those little munchkins were literally bouncing off the walls. And ooooh, what a mess!! I guess that's a good indication of how much fun was had by all. That night we just vegged at home and it felt great and well deserved. Early the next morning, we had some friends over for breakfast. Everyone brought something. Needless to say, we were absolutely exhausted by Sunday night.

Adoption Update

So do you want to hear the bad news or the bad news first? Well, we contacted our agency to find out when we should start our homestudy. We were expecting to hear March 2008 at the latest. Instead we were told that we should wait another 10 or 11 months before we start our homestudy update. At this point in time the referral wait time is still 6 to 8 months (for a boy) and 12 to 18 months for a girl. So what does this mean? Well, let's do the calculation. If we have to wait 11 months to begin our homestudy update that takes us to October 2008. It will likely take about 2 months for an update, so that takes us to December 2008. Then we have to wait 8 months for a referral so that takes us to August 2009 and the wait time to travel is usually 3 months so that takes us to November 2009. Yes, that's right. 2 years from now. The agency realizes that the time has increased. I was told that the winter is slow in Vietnam and that I should call the agency back in June 2008. So there you have it. Oh yeah, I also heard that the Ontario Ministry has raised the requirement of a homestudy, so not only does this mean that it's going to cost more and obviously take longer, but will Alex and I even meet the requirements this time around? As someone else in the adoption world so blatantly put it "more hoops to jump through." At this point in time, I just don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. There are two other programs we can look into however India has the same wait time as Vietnam currently. They were looking into shortening it but these things take time. There is also the Ukraine. Definitely an option however it would require that we fly over to the Ukraine and pick a child. These things take a long time and most parents are averaging a 4 week stay as a minimum. I believe the wait time from start to finish is running between 12 to 18 months. It's too much to think of right now and I just need a mental break from anything adoption for a while. It's too discouraging with no end in site.

Vacation in Italy

We just returned from our vacation in Italy. This time it was extra special since our family finally got to meet Miss Portia. Everyone fell head over heels for her. I think she found it hard coming home and facing the reality that 1) the world actually does not revolve around her and 2) that she really isn't a princess. All kidding aside, Portia was great and we are so fortunate that she travels so well. We stayed in Milan for a few days. As usual, we started off with an outdoor market where the costs were so cheap, it would have been a sin not to buy. On the Friday, we headed to Livigno (a small town nestled high between the mountains near the Switzerland border). I would have to say that this is officially one of my top 5 favorite places in Italy. We ate fresh cheeses, pizzocheri, bresaola and swiss chocolate. The foods exceeded any of our expectations. The only thing I regret is not running up the mountain and singing "The Sound of Music." Aaah, but don't worry, there's always next time. We also got to go to the Liguria. Alex's aunt has a beach house in Ceriale. Here is where you find the bluest of blue oceans. And again the food. Zia Tina's culinary skills would put a World Top Chef to shame. We decided to return to Cinque Terre (also one of the top 5 on my list). What can we say? It was just as beautiful as we left it and no picture could ever do it justice. I'm hoping that next time we go, we can walk the complete paths between the small towns. I've been told it's quite the workout but well worth it. As a family we did walk the Via Del'Amore. It ran along the outside of the mountain so the scenery was spectacular. We realized once again that we would need more time to see everything at a normal pace, not to mention Porto Fino, so we plan to return there as well. Our last week, we stayed in Milan and took it easy. We must have hit every market available to us, so it took us about a week to pack. We even had to send a box by courier since we knew we would have to pay a hefty fine at the airport...and in the end had to pay anyways!! That's another story but definitely a big lesson learned. So, now we're at home and dreaming of our next get away. I think we just might have enough to get us over the bridge to Hull, assuming we hitch hike.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

It's been a while since we posted any baby information. We are still feeling the loss of our China baby. For the last two months, we've been asking ourselves "Where do we go from here?". So many possibilites. Do you ever go to a restaurant and there's just too many choices on the menu. The waitress keeps coming back but you just can't seem to make up your mind. Well, I guess you can say, it's sort of like that but just more emotional, complicated and definitely more expensive. So on the menu we have these choices: 1) Do we just stick with one child? We asked Portia how she felt about this, but she became very upset. Truly, we don't feel that was the right answer for us anyway. 2) Do we try to adopt domestically? For the record, we did have a chance to adopt a new born baby, however, for personal reasons decided against it. This is a decision that we may likely regret for life. 3) Do we choose another country and try to adopt internationally again?
We're not sure what the future holds but for the moment we've registered with a Vietnam Adoption Agency. That only means that we are on a waiting list which will give us time before we need to make any real costly decisions. In the meantime, we continue to pray for guidance.

Fall Is In The Air

Well, summer is finally over and the leaves are quickly falling from the trees. What's new?? Portia started school. She was so excited to be going but I really had a hard time letting go. The first day she took the school bus was the hardest. She looked so beautiful, yet still so baby like. I kept questioning myself, wondering if I was doing the right thing. Maybe I should wait another year before I send her off...but I knew she really wanted to go and needed the stimulation. Of course the school bus came late and for every passing moment, our anxiety grew. Finally it came around the corner and I sensed Portia hesitating. Alex must have sensed how we were feeling since he swiped her up, put her on the bus between two bigger children, and sent her off. The doors closed and I stood there crying like a baby. Alex had to drive me home since I was a mess. I came into our quiet house and started to bawl. A little while later, a friend called (Tina) and informed me that she saw Portia, and her massive backpack, get off the bus. Actually she was so small, the teacher had to help her down. She just looked at Tina and said "Hi zia. Where's Tianna?", as if it was any regular day. Portia was so excited when we came to pick her up at the bus stop. She even told us that one of the big kids that she sat with held her hand. She said she couldn't wait to go back to school. Yeah, let's see how long she sings that tune?!

And Then The Rain Came

It's been a long while since we've posted. A lot has happened since. First of all, I'm no longer working. As timing would have it, our adoption agency contacted us and informed us that China declined our request to adopt. This news broke our hearts. We had been waiting and hoping for so long. We had originally applied for our second adoption in October 2005, but after 20 months (or 2 pregnancies long and then some), we were informed that our journey had ended. We are trying to remain positive, but just as anyone else, some days are harder than others. I think this time, the rain is going to last a while.

Water From The Moon

There's been a few people that have told us (sometimes jokingly) that we've taken the easy way out by choosing adoption. I've always remained silent but since this is my blog, I will kindly share how I really feel. I don't think they realize that it was a long 7 years from the time we tried to conceive to the time we finally, through the miracle of adoption, had our precious daughter in our arms. 5 years of wondering each month, if this would be the month. Fertility medication, needles, hormones, mood-swings, weight gain and other medication side effects, taking temperatures, timing everything, hoping every month, mourning every month, stress on a marriage, pain and tears when I saw a baby or pregnant woman, for not feeling like a woman and although looking back, it feels silly, I did wonder if my husband would love me less or continue to love me. You can probably call this many things...time consuming, expensive, educational, roller coaster ride, etc., but somehow "easy" just doesn't seem to be the word that I would choose to describe adoption.

Although I would like to use our blog site to share our 2nd adoption, I think it's important to educate others and let them know what the adoption process entails.

Genesis 1:28 "Further, God blessed them and God said to them: "Be fruitful and become many and fill the earth..."

A Little Voice

Out of the mouth of babes....

• As my beautiful daughter sat there listening while I read her a story, she started looking at me. As her mommy, it was a proud moment. A moment that touched my heart. A moment that can only be shared by a mother and daughter. A moment that would be etched into my memory forever. That was until she asked me if I was a boy or a girl and pointed to my moustache. Thank goodness I keep my legs covered through the winter, otherwise she'd be really confused. LOL!!

CCAA Site Update - February 2007

• The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with their office before March 22, 2006.
• The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with their office before October 13, 2005.

Fact: An elephant's gestation period lasts about 22 months, the longest gestation period of any mammal.

Fact: We'll likely have to wait 22 months from the time our dossier was logged in, to the time we get to see the first picture of our new daughter. Then it will be almost another 2 months after that before we actually meet her.

Hmmm. Now which mammal again has the longest gestation (paper-gestation) period?

Terrible Two's has nothing on the Terrible Three's

Ahhhh, the never ending stories....This photo was taken after Portia helped herself to one of our friend's lipsticks (without asking of course). Then after a fairly late night we were certain Portia was going to sleep-in the next morning but nope! She snuggled in between Alex and I, and agreed that she would sit quietly and watch TV while we slept a little bit longer. Silence is never a good thing. I opened up my eyes to find Little Miss P knuckle deep into her nose and wiping all her SNOTS on Daddy's back. Then there was tonight. She shoved a Cheerio into her nose, then realized it didn't quite fit, so she pulled it out and ate it. Why I ask?! Well, she's probably asking why not?!

Monthly Adoption Referral Information

It's been over 1 month since the last batch of referrals but finally we have an update directly from the CCAA (China Centre of Adoption Affairs). According to their website it states that:

• The CCAA has finished the review of the adoption application documents registered with our office before January 31, 2006.


• The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before September 27, 2005.
  

You are probably wondering what this all means. Well, as of today, they have processed and completed the applications of those who have registered with the CCAA before and including September 27, 2005. In simpler terms, these families will be expecting a call from their agencies. This is one of the big moments we all wait for....The Referral Call. It's at this point that we learn our child's Chinese name, birthdate and the name and location of the orphanage. Usually within 1 week of this call, the new parents will receive an official proposal with pictures of their new child. Since I'm going down memory lane, I thought I would share the first pictures we received of our precious Portia.