A Lifetime in Three Months

So much has happened...where do I start? I think there is just too much to say. To keep it simple, we decided to stop the vietnam adoption process for personal reasons and then after a month passed and a full week of no sleeping, we realized it was the wrong decision for our family. We contacted the agency and re-opened the file. Coincidentally our file hadn't been completely closed and so here we are...still waiting, but this time, taking time to stop and smell the flowers since life is just too unpredictable, not to mention to count the great blessings that we already have...our little family...Alex, Portia and I. In the meantime, we will leave everything in God's hands and take each day as it comes.

Ministry Approval

We received an e-mail on Wednesday, April 9th that we have been approved by the Ministry and that our approval would be sent to Vietnam to complete our dossier. Our agency has told us that should we get approved, we should expect to travel next summer, so we have approximately 15 months ahead of us.

On another note, I still keep track of where we would have been in the wait, if China had approved us. According to a special forecast website, it looks the best estimated time for us would have been 2009-03-18 to receive a referral. It appears that the time has increased from the last time I checked.

Punta Cana, Dominican Republic

We just got back from a wonderful 1 week vacation in Punta Cana with some of our friends. We were 10 including the kids. We literally laughed for the whole week and it was one event after another. I sprained my toe, Portia got sick and had to see a doctor, Tina and Johnny both got a sun stroke, Jon got some weird rash on both legs and hand. And hours after Nancy stated "What's a matter with you people? I don't know if I'm going to travel with you again.", she stepped on a sea urchin and had to go see the doctor to remove all the spurs. Aside from this, we continued to laugh all week. Our rooms were beautiful and right outside we had a lazy pool that went around our building. Unfortunately, due to a bad storm, there was a lot of seaweed coming up from the ocean. On our last day, we had to catch the bus early but quickly learned that there was a power outage. It was literally pitch dark. Alex had to hold up our DVD player up to a mirror so I could put my contacts on. We later learned that Jon accidentally took his wife's prescription pills because he couldn't see and thought he was taking his anti-acids. What a laugh!

Adoption Update # 5

Our agency has reviewed our file and says that our homestudy and dossier looks good and no corrections need to be made. Unfortunately, Vietnam has increased some fees, therefore our agency will be sending us a new contract tomorrow for us to sign off. If we do get approved by the ministry, our file will be sent to Vietnam immediately. Then we wait. 2 approvals down, 2 more to go.

We've still have made the decision to not share any of this information with our friends or family since we feel it's too soon and to be honest, we don't talk about it as if it's a done deal, since as we know, it's never a done deal until we are back in Canada with a baby in our arms. We have some friends of ours that have adopted with us in China, and they too decided to adopt a second child from China. Unfortunately, although their file has been through the review room, it appears that the wait time has greatly increased. Infact, they may be pulling out their file since they are tired of waiting and their daughter keeps asking for a sibling. That to me is the thing that breaks our hearts, is to have a little one at home asking when they are finally going to get their baby brother/sister.

Agency Confirmation

We have confirmation that our agency has received our homestudy. They will review it and if it's okay, they will send it to the Ministry for approval, which takes 6 weeks. If it's not okay, we will have to work on the corrections. We also found out that the contract between us and our agency is no longer valid therefore we have to wait for the new contract and redo it. Since last night, I'm trying to make an effort to have a positive attitude, whether we get approved or not. There are tons of people out there that would love to be married and are not. There are lots of people that would love to have children and they can't. We all have to make the best out of our circumstances, especially when they are out of our control. Otherwise you can go through life feeling bitter and not enjoying all the blessings we really do have.

Don't Care

I've just gotten to the point that I just don't care anymore. When you have to work so hard at something and it's a constant battle, you just end up losing your zeal. Today we received our homestudy update, AFTER ALMOST 1 MONTH, and the sad thing is that there are errors in places that matter. I'm really hoping that the agency will just accept it as it is, since I'm done with going back and making changes. I never thought I would reach this point, but I just don't stinkin care. At least we can say we tried our very best and as much as I feel bad for Portia since lately that's all she asks about, I think deep down we are starting to picture ourselves as a complete family of 3, and you know what?? I'm starting to feel like that's fine by me. I finally just want off this roller coaster ride, once and for all.

Adoption Update # 4

1. We spoke to our agency and they requested that we ask our adoption practitioner to indicate only once that we were declined by China and to add the reason. Our social worker has agreed. PENDING: We have completed all the paperwork and so we are just waiting for the official copy of the homestudy and for another copy to be sent to our agency.

2. According to a China Adoption Forecast website, the families that were registered to adopt with us, are still waiting for a referral. This website indicates that their best guess would be 2009-02-26. I feel for these families since their files have been logged in since 2006-04-24, so it's been almost 2 years and that doesn't count for the time it took to complete their homestudies.